Towards getting your child back to school — without the guesswork.
Most schools have never had access to school avoidance training, so parents end up as both advocate and educator. If you are not getting the help you need, you may feel judged, misunderstood and exhausted. This free guide explains the school resources and U.S. laws specific to helping kids with school avoidance access their education — and the common mistakes that delay a return to school.
Our federal education and disability laws are on your side
Establishing a good working relationship with your school is crucial to getting your child back into the building. This is the only resource dedicated to explaining the U.S. federal laws that apply specifically to children with school avoidance.
What’s inside
Advocacy and education, section by section
Your child's right to a free appropriate education
Understanding your school's legal responsibility to make sure your child can access their education is where advocacy begins. We explain the federal framework in plain language.
The truth about attendance policies
Most families hit this roadblock, and it feels like salt in the wound. Learn how attendance rules actually work, where they bend, and what to ask for instead of a truancy letter.
The different roles school leaders play
Principal, counselor, child study team, attendance officer, director of special services — know who does what, so you take each request to the person who can actually approve it.
504s, IEPs — oh my!
The differences between these two supports cause enormous confusion. We break them down in layman's terms, with examples specific to anxiety-based school avoidance.
Avoid the detours
Common mistakes that delay or derail a return to school
You only get so many meetings, and each one matters. The guide shows you what to ask for, how to ask in writing, and what to do when the answer is no.
Agreeing to a plan built around consequences instead of accommodations
Accepting "she'll grow out of it" as a response from the school
Waiting for the school to suggest an evaluation rather than requesting one in writing
Letting home instruction become open-ended with no reintegration plan
Not documenting meetings, promises and refusals in follow-up emails
A parent who lived it, then built the resource she needed
Jayne has helped thousands of families navigate their child’s school avoidance and the path back to school. Her own son struggled for years, at a time when there was almost no awareness, understanding or data to guide them. Once he was well, she dedicated herself to other school avoidance families.
In 2014 she began researching and vetting the best treatment programs, providers and interventions. In 2020 she formed the School Avoidance Alliance to connect families, schools, mental health providers and researchers.
Families have enough stress when their kids start avoiding school. They deserve to have essential information and resources readily available, so they have the energy and strength to support the emotional needs of their child.
— Jayne Demsky
We work with professionals from
Columbia University Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders (NY)
The Anxiety Institute (CT)
The Center for Anxiety and Behavioral Change (MD)
Leiden University (Netherlands)
Not Fine in School (UK)
Kyushu University of Health and Welfare (Japan)
Use this guide to become your child’s best advocate
A good working relationship with your school is crucial to getting your child back to school. Start with the laws, the language and the plan — tell us where to send your free copy.
